It's about 1:00 am (PST) and I am wide awake as usual! These past few weeks sleep seems to elude me until around 4 or 5 in the morning. The result is a lot of time to think about things! This my friends could be very dangerous! I stay up at night plotting ways to sabotage the Obama campaign and help McCain sail to victory. *Laughs Evilly*
I also think about my life and my dreams and my walk with God. I have found that God is the biggest insomniac of all! He NEVER sleeps!!! That thought came to me tonight in between browsing you tube videos and my favorite blogs! It's nice to know that I don't have to talk to God between the hours of 8am and 4pm EST and even if someone else is talking to him I can call him up just to chat. I know I ask God for a lot of things but I think my favorite conversations with him have been those in which I just want to "say hi" or let him know I'm thinking about him. I think God really likes that sort of thing. Sometimes I think God must feel like our parents sometimes feel. We only call when we need something. (Sorry mom!) I must need things a lot because I call her all the time!!! But seriously I enjoy my little chats with God. Sometimes they are very short just a little hey God I just wanted to say I love you! Or maybe a quick Thank You Lord for your blessings today. Sometimes I don't have talks with God nearly enough and I neglect our special time together. I get so caught up in life that I forget to take that time. The nice thing is God forgives that as long as I ask him to! Sometimes especially at night when I can't sleep I'll sit on my bed and I'll just talk out loud. Some would think I am talking to myself but I know God is listening and even more importantly he actually cares about the things I have to say! It's amazing I can sit back and just say "you know I'm not sure what to do right now I'm at this crossroads in my life and I have so many decisions to make I could really use some guidance here. What's your advice Jesus should I try to finish school in a year or should I hang out at UAM a little longer to prevent some stress." I've never had a voice speak to me and give me the direct answer but the answer always comes. I'm still waiting on that particular answer but I can feel it coming and I have a feeling that in a future chat between two insomniacs God will reveal the next step that I need to take. He's pretty awesome that way he may wait until "the last minute" to light the path and he may only light one step at a time but as long as I follow his flashlight I know I'll get where I'm going! Please don't look down on me for calling God an "insomniac" it is certainly not meant as a derogatory term. Some people view God as their Father or their lover or their very best friend. I consider God my fellow insomniac who stays up with me on the nights that I can't sleep and comforts me when fear grips my heart because I can't figure out which way to go. Sometimes I imagine him sitting on the bed with me at night or next to me in the chair on the computer just enjoying the evening. Insomnia can be a problem but hey the next time you find yourself wide awake at 1 AM just remember, God's an insomniac too!
Thanks for listening to these musings from an insomniac!
Yvonne
P.S. Sorry Mom I know you're hoping to get me up at a decent hour but sleep is again eluding me. I love you!
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1 comment:
Very amusing!! Now get up!!
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